:: Skinny ::

I reached and passed my goal: My weight is 69 kg. (like 150 lbs.) I had promised myself to reach 70 kg. at the end of the year. 13kg. are gone (God, I was such a pig).

Now, how about 65kg in march? I don't know. I was ok in 70kg for 3 years before starting eating crap in San José downtown on my previous job. Now I think I look good again. btw, I need a camera. I am a very narcissist person.

Wanna know my diet? Vodka instead of beer, one fruit a day. Out of that, all the same crappy food but in a slightly smaller amount. Cold pizza for breakfast with diet coke. Buffalo wings from Rock n' Roll Pollo or tacos dinner. Chinese food for lunch. Anything. Stopping when I start feeling satisfied.

Since I got to 71kg. decrease has been slower, but there's still a difference from one week to the next.

:: in my coldest hour ::

I am burning bridges after i cross them.

I am wandering to places the people that loves me can't follow.

I can see them, I can touch them, but I don't feel them.

I am growing tired. People takes much and give much in exchange. But what they give has little use for me.

I need something different. The closest thing to love that I feel now is to one of those persons I've never been close to. Non Costa Ricans tend to link to me better, another signal telling me I don't belong here.

I sleep at my parents house because I want to save and not pay a rent. But they still think they have a kid. And they pass me all of their problems. The rent is getting expensive on the stress and stupid rules types of currency. I'm specially sick of my father.

I am going to see a few apartments near the office. What I'll save in gas will almost pay the rent. I will keep this job a year until my freelance projects start paying off. Then I'll have saved enough and have a constant income even if I go to a place I don't dislike this much, and struggle to get on my feet there.

That's the safe plan. I might get crazy any day, fill a suitcase, sell my car and leave. Get any job to get along. But at least I'll be in MY place. I'll be able to start thinking further in my future, buy furniture and things the I can't get here because it's a waste of money if I'll leave, I feel so out of place.

Where? Europe anywhere. Scandinavian countries, Holland, Portugal, Italy, Germany, England, even Spain. Language is one thing to consider, even if people tells me all of the time that with English and Spanish I'll be alright, specially as a Software Engineer/Web developer, everyone in the industry will understand me in English. Even in the company I work, English is a standard and everyone is able to pass and receive ideas at least. In a third world country.

I need to know migration policies, job permits and other stuff that has to be observed.

I never been this close to make the move. All links broken, bank account growing... I'm craving for movement.